Monday, June 13, 2011

Seven year old's shouldn't have to worry..

To say Colton is a special kid is an understatement. And I'm not just saying that because he's my son. Other people recognize this in him as well, always being referred to as a little man, smart and wise beyond his years. I have always believed God created Colton tailor made for me, he is a great sleeper always has been, this is a child who never climbed out of his crib let alone on top of things, and to be completely honest he still cannot climb that great! He's just the right pace for me, he went through stages as a toddler where I struggled to keep up, but other then that he is a great kid for me. He is so slow paced in fact it gets him in trouble sometimes at school, and with us. Known nick names for Colton include pokey, slow poke, turtle, and Eeyore. Colton's a sit back and watch kinda kid, let's see what happens then maybe I will join in. Most kids his age enjoy super hero's, baseball and car's, Colton on the other hand enjoys antiques, vacuums, watches, marbles, and radio's. Colton has always been aware of my disease, I have never kept it from him, always been completely honest in an age appropriate way. And every hospital stay has been hard on him, but I think the fact that they were mostly around a year apart he has recovered from them and been able to not worry and get back to being a kid with no worries, except whether or not I'd let him have oreo's for breakfast (some morning's I do). Well it has become painfully obvious my recent continued illness's is taking it's toll on him. I have noticed he has been more clingy to me, not wanting to stay nights away, while I was napping at Mom's she said he was checking up on me. He tells me he loves and hugs me at least 20 times a day. And our usual bedtime routine includes more I love you's, hugs and kisses. Tonight was a usual night until I hugged him. I gave him the usual hug, kiss and said good night. I turned around to leave and he said "Can I have another hug, because I could really use one" I of course said yes and went back to hug him and when I did he squeezed me really tight and said "I love you so much" and started to cry. I said "I love you too buddy, why are you crying?" Through his tears and sobs he said "It's hard to explain" I said "You just love me so much" him "yes, I just worry about you sometimes" And chocking back tears myself, I did my best to reassure him I will be fine and he shouldn't worry about me, that it was my job to worry about him, and put him to bed for the night. Then I came to the living room and cried like a baby. Seven year old's shouldn't have to worry....



Colton and I at Tahquamenon Falls, Newberry MI on our vacation

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