My Year in Review or I guess you could say the rearveiw :)

So I'm sure like everyone else my 2010 had it's up's and down's. I don't remember anything to spectacular or eventful in Jan 2010. But February came in with a bang, Colton had his appendix removed on February 1st and 2 weeks later got pneumonia as a complication from the surgery, that was one of the hardest things to go through as a mother, to watch my baby in pain and want to take it away or trade him places, I was a wreck for weeks, this is also when I started my blog. In March Colton celebrated his 6th birthday, he got a quad from us and had a bowling party with family. April brought on sickness for me, just the regular run of the mill CF stuff, I was admitted for 2 weeks and had home IV's for another week. All the while working on Great Strides CF walk stuff. I coordinate the Great Strides walk in my home town every year with help from the CF foundation. We had our walk on May 16th, 2010 and it was a huge success raising near $10,000.00 (this is a huge amount for my small rural town). After the unwind of the busy work with the walk and Colton finishing the school year Brad took a vacation and we headed to one of my favorite places the day after school was out June 7th! We loaded the motor home and headed to Silver Lake Sand Dunes! I grew up riding dune buggy's on these dune's and it has always been my favorite spot in Michigan. It was Colton's first time going and as I suspected he loved it and demanded to go back! So as per his request as one of the things he wanted to do on his summer break that he had never done, stay in a hotel. So we asked our closest friends to go and we packed up and headed back to Silver Lake in July. Here's a post about that visit . As our July ended and August began we kinda just chilled at home and enjoyed the beautiful summer we had, swimming almost everyday! I also take Colton to Michigan's Adventure every year, it's an amusement park about 2 hours from our home. We planned a last minute trip with my cousin and her friend, we had a great day. Unfortunately my Dog got sick the day before, we still went but she spent the majority of the day in the Vets office being tested. You can read about her in these 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 posts. September 1st came to be one of the saddest day's of my life. Colton also started the 1st grade Sept. 7th, which he enjoys much better then Kindergarten. But over all September was a bad month we lost a good car, our Dog, and our other dog Diesel tore his knee. October came I celebrated my 28th birthday on Halloween! I love my birthday's, I mean I know most people do but I always feel so blessed to have grew another year older, always saying I made it another one! With November came Diesel's knee surgery and Hunting, you can read all the things I was Thankful for here. I was especially thankful on the 24th when I went to my first concert ever! I got to see Shinedown one of my favorite bands ever! the majority of October and November I felt crappy, knowing I needed to get in for a "clean out". So on December 7th I went into the hospital for 10 days and did home IV's for 11 more days at home. Came home just in time for all the family Christmas' and wonderful festivities. We had a great Christmas actually having our last one last night, with my brothers wonderful girlfriend! Also happened in 2010, we had a wedding in May, our really close friends got married in June, and 2 friends from High school got married in July! My brother got divorced which was a blessing in disguise! My sister and Brother in law moved back to Michigan from Mississippi, one of our good friends had a baby, and our best friends are expecting their first in April. All in all it was a great year with hills and valleys. "There's a touch of grey For every shade of blue That's the way that I see Life If there was nothing wrong Then there'd be nothing right" Shinedown, The Sound of Madness, What a Shame. So I am ringing in the new year with Brad and Colton we went to the movies earlier had spaghetti for supper, now they are watching another movie and I'm about to join them. Happy New Year everyone! I hope 2011 brings great things for all.

Thankful Thursday

So I decided to jump on the blog band wagon from over at Run Sick Boy Run and post some things I'm thankful for this week.

First off I'm Thankful that I'm going home tomorrow after a 10 day hospital stay! I am thankful for the advances in medicine that I can continue the rest of my care in the comfort of my home with my husband and son by my side. Brings me to two more things Im thankful for Brad! He is an amazing husband, supportive, giving, and caring among a lot of other great things. I truly found an angel in him he really takes great care of me and encourages me to take great care of myself. And then there's Colton I am beyond Thankful for him! He gives me so much love and care always willing to help Mom whether it be making me laugh or getting nebs for me, he also knows what aerosal meds I take and will get them for me sometimes. He is another angel from God for me. He gives me the drive to fight.I am Thankful for a long time friend that visited me today, that put a smile on my face and my heart. I'm also thankful for the comforts of home, like my favorite pizza place that I intend on having for supper tomorrow. My dogs that I miss very much. And not to be to deep but I am truly thankful for being able to live my life with a purpose.

I am happy to slow down and be thankful in my everyday life, because you just never know when those things your thankful for will be gone.

Update on Hospital stay

Figured I would do an update as promised. So the plan was to discuss doing desensitization with the doctors, well I seen an on call doctor all weekend that I wasn't comfortable with, and maybe that's because he comes in at 6AM!!! If you know me, you know that I am not a morning person at all! I never have been, so I don't really wake up if doctor's come in that early. Doctors that see me on a regular basis know this and they will come by a little later when they know I will be up, unless they absolutely can't then I understand they see me earlier. So anyways, I decided to wait until today to discuss it. But in the mean time I was still on Tobramycin and Zosyn and they added colitine aerosol. Well because of it being "intermediate" to my bugs they decided running it 24 hours instead of a one hour bag every 6 hours would be more effective. I have no problem with this but here was the problem, when they put my PICC in they only put a single lumen, well Tobramycin and Zosyn are not compatible, so this meant I needed a double ended hookup or lumen. Basically so they could run Tobra every 12 hours without having to stop the Zosyn, so I can get 2 meds at once. Well every other time I have had a PICC I have gotten a double lumen, not this time! Never needed a double before, now that I do I don't have one. So Saturday morning they took me back down to have it swapped out with a double, luckily this is quite simple, it took the doctor like 5 minutes and with a little lidocaine I didn't feel a thing. But here's the kicker I was down there for 2 hours for a five minute thing, that was irritating. So that was my drama for the weekend! LOL But after that it was a great weekend, Mom and Dad brought Colton down to visit and brought me TONS of candy and goodies! And a huge canister full of candy for my wonderful nurses! Was really great to see Colton, and he told the nurse the sweetest thing, she asked what was on top of his Christmas list and he said for me to feel better and come home <3 My heart melted! I love that boy! So for whatever reason, maybe all the excitement Saturday, I was exhausted Sunday and napped a lot. So finally to today, bless the doctor he didn't come in until about 5pm! I discussed my thought process on the desensitization and wanted to get the best treatment out of my stay and fear of losing lung function. He said he would discuss it with the other CF doctors and see what they say, but he thinks I will get the results I'm looking for from the treatment I'm on. So I guess I'll find out tomorrow what they think all together. My plan is to get out Friday, with home IVs for another week or so. I guess that's all for now :) As if that's not enough! LOL

Hospital Stay....again :(

Well I'm back at good old "Club Med" aka Spectrum Medical Center in Grand Rapids MI. It's kinda just the usual stuff, but there's been a few complications. Let me start from the beginning. I had clinic back in September, my lung function was decreased slightly but not enough to be hospitalized. I had been having a lot of lung pain so the doctor put me on 600mg Ibuprofen every 8 hours. That really took care of the pain, but I started developing fevers in the evenings. I called the docs office and they put me on a 2 week round of Cipro. I finished that, felt better, and fevers subsided....for a short time. The fevers came back as well as fatigue, loss of appetite, and shortness of breath. Called the doctors again and they said they thought I was having mild to moderate symptoms and ordered a different oral anti-biotic for 2 weeks, Levaquin. I finished that round and felt somewhat better again and fevers went away again. But once again they came back a couple weeks later. By this time I was sick of of feeling sick! I called and told the nurse that I really needed to be admitted that my symptoms had came back again, she said she would talk to the doctor and call me back, of course the doctor said direct admit. So that was Tuesday, after 4 days I am feeling slightly better but some small complications have came up. They started me on my usual regimen of IV anti-biotics Tobramycin and Zosyn. Now 4 days have later my cultures came back and my strains of pseudomonas are "intermediate" to the meds they have me on. This means they are not the most effective to treat my bugs. The drug that is most effective I am allergic to. So today the doctor want to tried to give this drug to me with benedryl to try and stop the reaction, which is full body hives. Well as I suspected it didn't work, we stopped it and the doctor decided to go back to the original plan, to treat with the other 2 drugs even though they are not the best option. Here's my dilemma, I want to use the best drug I can to kick this bug! And there is a process called desensitization, where they give me small amounts of the drug slowly building the amount to full strength so my body doesn't react to the drug. I had it done before a couple years ago with a different drug and it worked. I am going to talk to the doctor tomorrow about this option. I just feel like I am already here and although yes I am starting feel better with the normal regime, I feel like if I don't get the best drug I will be back sooner then normal and risk losing more lung function that I can not afford to lose. So we will see what tomorrow brings and hopefully I can do whats best for my lungs.

30 Days of Thankfulness!

This month I stole a post from a friend on facebook , she was doing something she was thankful for everyday. I decided to do the same and I have compiled them in this blog for everyone's reading pleasure.

Day 1 of 30 Days of Thanks- I am thankful to have my Grandma Mable still in my life, at 71 she is amazing and I would be lost without her help, encouragement, listening ear, wise advise, and crazy moments that make me laugh ♥

Day 2 of 30 Days of Thanks- Today I am thankful to be a free American citizen, with the right to vote and make my voice heard! Although I feel a may not make much difference because everything has just gone so bad, I am still thankful for that right.

Day 3 of 30 days of Thanks- I'm thankful today for the medical advances that have helped me live beyond the years that was prognosed for me a a child, the gift of these years I am eternally grateful for.

Day 4 of 30 days of Thanks- Today I am Thankful for my handsome, amazing, extraordinary Son Colton! Being told I would never have kids, to be given the amazing gift of being a mother is by far the best thing in my life ♥

Day 5 of 30 Days of Thanks- Today I am thankful for my MOM!! I love her more then anything and could not survive without all her amazing help, she's more then my mom she's my best friend ♥

Day 6 of 30 days of Thanks- Today I am thankful for all my friends! New, Old, Cyber, Close, Distant, all of these friends I appreciate and care for deeply ♥

Day 7 of 30 Days of Thanks- Today I am thankful for my In laws, they are amazing people! Loving, supportive, caring, giving, and all other amazing things ♥

8th Day of Thanks- 7 years ago today I married the most incredible man in this world!! He is an amazing husband and father, he irritates the hell out of me too, but I love him more every year!

Day 9 of 30 Days of Thanks- Today I am thankful for my pets, they are like children to me and I love each and everyone of them ♥ It has been a rough year for us with the animals we lost Dog on Sept 1st, Colton's goldfish died the next week, Diesel tore his ACL a couple weeks later,and our cat that stays outside has been missing for almost 2 weeks. But we will get through it all and I will never give up on them.

Day 10 of 30 Days of Thanks- I am thankful for baby's today! I have the pleasure of watching 7 month old Blake today and it reminds me how special little life's are ♥ and I can't wait for Chasta to have her baby in in April!

Day 11 of 30 Days of Thanks- I am Thankful for all the veteran's past, present and future. For without your sacrifice I would probably not have so many things to be thankful for ♥ Shout out to all on my friends list who have served or serving and are married to someone who has served or serving! Not just the soldiers make the sacrifice the family's give a lot too.

Day 12 of 30 Days of Thanks- I am thankful today for my big brother! He's one of my best friends and is always there for me, I can tell him anything and he always gives me great advice, or a good wake up call if I need it. And like all big brothers he has also torchered me the majority of my life. Here's to you Big Guy ♥

Day 13 of Thanks- Today I am thankful for a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food in my fridge. Because I know not everyone has these things and I am thankful I do.

Day 14 of Thanks- I am thankful for sleep! To say I like to sleep is an understatement! And sleeping in this morning felt amazing!

Day 15 of 30 days of Thanks- Today I am thankful that I had Dog in my life for almost 8 years, she was with me in some hard times and the 2 best times, marrying Brad and having Colton. Today would have been her 8th b-day :( I know I already posted a thanks for my pets, but Dog was special and I will never find another like her.

Day 16 of 30 Days of Thanks- Today I am thankful Brad has a good paying job that has provided for our family and allowed me to be a stay at home mom for the past 6 years.

Day 17 of 30 Days of Thanks- Today I am thankful for good Vets and caring people that fixed Diesel today and are taking care of him until tomorrow.

Day 18 of Thanks- I am thankful for facebook, I get to stay in better touch with so many family and friends, plus I get useless information all the time! LOL and I get to post useless info too :)

Day 19 of Thanks- I am thankful for ALL my family! Near, far, close, distant, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandma's, grandpa's, mom, dad, Brandon and Sarah EVERYONE who is related to me ♥

Day 20 of 30 Thanks- Today I am thankful for my brothers girlfriend Sarah. She puts up with my brother and makes him happy, and that makes me happy and thankful. And for reasons unknown to me he apparently makes her happy too! LOL

Day 21 of Thanks- I am Thankful for my DAD, he is my biggest fan next to Mom and he expects the best from me which makes me expect that of myself. I have to attribute most my good health to him, he never let me skip my treatments and before I had my vest he was almost always the one pounding on me. I hated him for push...ing me so hard on my health when I was young, but I love him for it now. ♥ you DAD

Day 22 of 30 days of Thanks- Today I am thankful for the life God has given me. I am thankful for every part of it, the good and the bad, because without feeling and enduring the bad I would not be able to enjoy the good. And I have said this before and it may sound crazy but it includes everything I have dealt with having CF, it's made me who I am, and I happen to like that person :)

Day 23- Today I am thankful for the great food my family got to eat at Brad's parents for Thanksgiving, it was all very yummy! Thank you Janet and Shannon for doing such a great job ♥

Day 24- I'm Thankful I got to go to an awesome SHINEDOWN concert tonight!! It was so great, and as strange as it sounds it was the first time I have been to a concert!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Day 25 of Thanks today I am thankful for my mom's amazing cooking! And time with family ♥

Day 26 of 30 days of thanks- I am thankful I did not go out for black friday, my bed was a much better place to be. I am also thankful I do not have the stomach flu like Brad! He has been up since like 4am either on the toilet or over it :(

Day 27 of 30 Days of Thanks- I am Thankful Brad is feeling better, and that my Mom was able to keep Colton the past 3 1/2 days.

Day 28 of thanks- I am so thankful that Brad did not have to worse of the 2 diagnosis that were possible! And for those that were praying for us ♥ And my mom for once again being able to take Colton tonight :)

Day 29 of Thanks- I am thankful for God and all the prayers he answers for me ♥ And for the ones he doesn't, because I may not see it but he knows what's best :)

Day 30 of 30- Today I am Thankful for Abby, who was the one who inspired my 30 Day's of Thanks! Making speak the things I am thankful for daily has really made me realize how great I have it. And like I have always said there is always someone worse off then you, so be Thankful for what you have daily ♥

So here's to a great November of Thankfulness and going into a great holiday season!

Resent results from clinic

So I went to my 3 month clinic appointment last Thursday. Nothing real exciting about it, I was hoping my PFT's would have increased into the 50% area but no such luck. I was not surprises though after the stressful month I had and losing Dog the week before had a big impact on me. Stress always does for me it really puts me down, I'm not sure why, I mean I know it's bad for everyone but it just reeks havoc on my body. I have been staying in the same range for the last 6 months between 45-47% which is good that I'm not losing any, but I have been striving for almost 2 years to get back in the 50% area. About 2 years ago I got an infection that I couldn't get rid of and I was allergic to the meds that would have been best to treat it. Well after being sick and in the hospital 3 times in one year (the most ever for me), they finally did a desensitization to the med so my body would take it and got rid of the bug. I lost about 15% lung function in that time and have been unable to re-gain it. It is very frustrating to me but I will keep trying. I have also been having a lot of lung pain lately so the doctor started me on 600mg Ibuprofen 3 times a day, he also thinks it will help the inflammation in my lungs. So I will go back in about 3 months and still hoping for improvement.

Colton is back in school now, started 1st grade last week and seems to being liking it much better then last year. We are all still dealing with the loss of Dog and have sad moments, but are doing much better. I have been on a cleaning spree the last few days. I have cleaned out and organized our computer/hunting room, the living room closet, the laundry room, and our bedroom! I am pretty impressed with how good they look. The dust is not helping my allergies, but with nasel wash and spray they seem fine.

Well I guess that's all for now.

Dog the final chapter

Rest in peace Dog 11/14/02- 9/1/10

I had made up my mind, I was going to go get Dog Wednesday morning bring her home, have a couple days with her and make an appointment to have her put down. That all changed Wednesday morning when I got a call from the vet at MSU, Dog had gotten really bad early that morning had a few seizures and was unresponsive basically in a coma. She was suffering and I had to give the vet permission to put her down then. It was devastating to me I wanted to be with her in that moment as she had been with me for some off my hard times, but I couldn't let her suffer just so I could get there that would not be fair. I got around and Mom rode down with me to pick her body up. It was the longest ride to and from Lansing ever, I just wanted to get her home and say goodbye. When I got home Brad and I had to tell Colton. This was very hard, Colton has never known life without her, she has been in his life from day 1. He cried and so did I, although he took it better then I thought he would and in fact told me that he did not think she was going to make it, and she wasn't going to come home, kids have intuition I think that us adults lose. So we wrote her letter's he drew her a picture, gave her on of his stuffed animals that she loved and would go steal from his room when he wasn't home, he also gave her a chap-stick and a Kleenex he had blew his nose on because she loved to eat those things. She was in a big box so we took the lid and wrote messages all over that put her favorite blanket that she carried everywhere and chewed on constantly and toys in with her. Brad and I took an ink print of her paw and plan on getting tattoo's of it soon. My in laws came down and my Mom and Grandma Mable everyone loved her. Brad and his Dad put her in the hole and Grandma said a prayer, we all put some dirt in, and then Brad finished filling it in. I loved her so much! I miss her, my bedroom does not feel the same without her, there is a piece of my heart gone with her. She was a great Dog and friend, she was family.