Dog my first child Part 1

Hiding in the the couch cushion

Ripping on Grandma's Hair

Can barely see her hiding behind Dad's Head

Dog is my 7 year old Black Lab Saint Bernard mix. Dog is her name and she is also my baby. This is Dog's story. My brother had a full blooded St. Bernard, Annabell was her name and she got pregnant by the neighbors Black Lab. November 14th 2002 she gave birth to a litter of puppy's (I don't recall the exact number). I love animals, always have, had them my whole life. Dog's, Cat's, Hamster's, Rabbit's, Goat's, Horse's, not all at the same time, well some at the same time. Anyways you get the picture always had pets. When Annabell had her puppy's I did not have a pet and had not had one for a while. I had just moved back home after moving out of my boyfriends house and we had pretty much broke up. So I would go play with these puppy's and feel in love with them, they were all black with white patches on their chest and some had white on their feet. Every time we would go see them there was the runt she would slink to the back of the Dog house and bark and growl at you being tough, while staying as far away as possible. That was Dog. When we were growing up when we would get animals my Dad always made us choice the runt, he thinks they are the best in the bunch. So I took her home when she was 8 weeks old. He said I couldn't keep her, well yeah right I batted my eyes, made him play with her and voila I get to keep her, but there was a stipulation...I had to name her Dog! I had already named her Riley but he called her Dog so much that is what stuck thus her name is Dog. She was the best puppy ever, I had her potty trained in 2 weeks to get me up and go outside, she is so smart and had I took the time to train her could do amazing things, but I just wanted a companion. I had just broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years and she made me feel better. My Dad loved her too and to this day when my dad comes over Dog gets really excited, more so then other people. He took care of her when I worked. I took her to all her vet appointments and got her fixed when she was old enough. This is how I got Dog and the beginning of our story. I will post more soon.

Speech I wrote for Great Strides event

This is something I wrote to share with people at a great strides walk a couple years ago and thought I would share it on here. I was unable to make it to the walk because I was in the hospital but a friend relayed the message for me.

My name is Jamie I am a wife, a mom, and a daily fighter of Cystic Fibrosis, (CF). My parents got the diagnosis of CF when I was 2 weeks old, they were told I probably wouldn't live to be a teenager. I will be celebrating my 26th birthday next month This is in part to major funding and research from events like this and Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, that's why this event and the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation is so important to me. The funding from this event and others like this are what has enabled me to beat this disease as long as I have.

Growing up with CF was not easy as a child. I always had medicine and therapy's to take and do, this always made it hard to make friends, keep friends, and have regular playtime with friends. This was also hard because I was living for everyday and didn't think I would graduate high school, told I would be lucky to make it to 16. As new research came and new treatments were available that median age was raised to 20, when you get to high school it's all about planning to make your future. By the time I made it to high school the idea of making plans for my future was hard, I didn't want to waste the years I had in school. So I didn't I chose to date, work, and eventually marry and have my son. Also being told you only have so many years to live can do a number on your physiological health. But it can also be a gift, I was given the opportunity to live life to the fullest and experience things in life in the time that I thought I had. And yet with more drugs and therapy's came more years to live. When I got married when I was 21 the median age was 32, two years later it changed to what it is now which is 37.

With these added years comes added life, but also added challenges. All the new medications and treatments mean more time and energy into my health, which is time and energy taken away from the things I love such as family, hobby's, and even the ability to have a job or career. To give you an idea of what these treatments and medications entail I'd like to give you a run down of the things I do during the day. I take no fewer then 11 separate medications a day to manage my CF. I wish this meant that I only had to take 11 pills a day, but thats not the case I take approximately 50 medication each day. These medications include several different pills as well as inhalers. My treatments also include several different lung clearance exercises. These are designed to loosen up mucus so that I can cough it out easily. One of those is a chest vest that I put on twice a day, it shacks me to loosen the mucus, each session takes about 30-40 minutes. The other lung clearance that I do is cardio and weight training about a hour a day. I also have do nasal washes twice a day to clear mucus from my nasal passages. These treatments and air way clearance exercises take up a great deal of my day. I do all this daily in the hopes that it will keep me infection free for months,and if I'm lucky up to a year and sometimes longer. As much as I keep up with these treatments daily it does not guarantee that I won't get an infection and be put in the hospital for what is called a clean out in the CF world. I have been hospitalized more then several times in my almost 26 years, my friend is relaying my message today because I am currently in the hospital, my third time in the past 12 months. These hospital stays require me to stay in patient for 1-2 weeks, and under go vigorous lung clearance and IV antibiotics. All of these things are what I do to maintain my health, I also have daily duties as a mother and wife that can sometimes add stress to my routine. The older I get the harder it is.

I'm telling you all of this because this is the reality of this disease that I fight on a monthly, weekly,and daily basis. I would give anything a side from family if it meant I didn't have to fight this anymore. That's why I need your help to raise not only money but awareness. The Cystic Fibrosis Foundation uses the phrase "adding tomorrows everyday" as their tag line. I am deeply appreciative of all the work that they do and for the ways that fund- raising efforts are enabling researchers to make "Great Strides" toward finding a cure for CF. The foundation has lived up to their motto and has done much to add many tomorrows for those of us with CF. But they can't do it alone they need everybody they can find to get involved, and to get their friends and family involved. We need all the people we can get to beat this disease. As I stated before I will celebrate my 26th birthday next month. The odds that I will get to celebrate my 37th birthday are 1 in 2. I thank all of you for getting involved to raise money for CF, it is greatly appreciated. I don't want to die waiting for a cure when so many others have already lost their life waiting.

A heartbreaking, heartwarming CF moment

This past weekend we went on a mini vacation to Silver Lake Sand Dunes, I have been going there since I was a child and it is my favorite place to go, I love it! I kinda get bitchy when I have to pack to go away because of all the extra's I have to take for CF, three extra bags! I get over it rather quickly because that's just the kind a person I am, I will complain about it for a bit and then move on because I know the complaining is not going to change it and I am truly thankful I am still well enough to travel. So we pack up take off, drive the 2 hours to get there, check in to the hotel (we normally camp but Colton had never stayed in a hotel and this was on his list of things he wanted to do this summer!) Unload everything and chill for a little bit. Our best friends Ben and Chasta went with us which I love because having friends with me makes me generally more happy. So we check out the local restaurants, I'm very familiar with the area but because we always camp I had never ate anywhere around there. We went to a little bar and ate supper, it was a really cool place and the food was pretty good too. Went back to the hotel and went swimming and got in the hot tub for a little bit before it closed. Finally got in the room for the night and was pretty exhausted, still had to do my therapy and Colton was wound like a ten day clock! So I proceeded to get ready for bed and do my therapy. Well I always make myself cough before I start because if I don't I will have a huge cough and have to stop my machines anyways. Well I had everything or so I thought I did, get my huge cough going and I'm bringing up a lot of crap so Colton says " Mommy I'll get you the tissues you forgot because I know you always need those and you forgot" he brings them to me and the trash can this was heartbreaking and heartwarming to me at the same time, I was smiling and had tears in my eyes. If you know Colton you know that he is the sweetest most sensitive boy ever, and would do just about anything for anybody at the age of 6! I got so emotional because the heartbreak that he has to live with and help me with fighting this disease is heartbreaking to me, this should not be part of a his life. But the way he is so sweet and kind and laying there in front of me smiling saying "I always know what Mom needs when she does her therapy" as if it is nothing, because to him it is in fact normal also made me smile because he is always thinking of his mommy, and makes me think I may be raising the most giving child there is and that warms my heart. A lot of people ask me what he knows of CF and it's affects. He knows it makes me sick and it's why I have to do my therapy's and take all my meds, I don't think he grasp what the disease actually does to my body but he knows that CF can kill people. He is my greatest motivator ever I have to fight to live so I can be with this amazing child that God has given me. So over all we had a great trip, did a lot of fun things had some great laughs with friends and did one of Colton's things on his list for summer.

CF Great Strides Walk

It's been awhile since I blogged I have been busy! I was in the hospital, got out did home Iv's for a week and then finale preparations for the walk. I coordinate and have a Great Strides walk in my hometown, with little help from the foundation so it's a lot of work for me. But it was last Sunday it and was a huge success! We raised $10,000.00!! That is a lot for the area I live in! There is a 12 year old girl, Aleeya who lives in the neighboring town to me and she has CF too so this is our walk in honor of us. She did an amazing job fund-raising bringing in 1,550.00 more then tripling her goal! We did a 50/50, silent auction, Aleeya fund-raised up until the end selling candy bars at the walk, we sold shirts for $10.00 and $6.00 goes back to the foundation, we still have some left if anyone is interested in them (the picture does not do the color justice they are a very pretty blue). So over all a huge success and a great feeling to have my hard work pay off :) Thanks to all of those who participated and donated it is greatly appreciated!

PICC"s and Ports

So this is kinda in response to Ronnie's post today at runsickboyrun.blogspot.com about getting his PICC placed yesterday and I'm looking forward to his post tomorrow about why he doesn't want a port placed and this is my PICC and port story.

For the laiman that read my blog PICC's are central lines that are placed in a vein in the arm and runs a line up almost all the way to the heart and can last for a long period of time but are not permanent. And a port is a permanent line that is placed in the arm or the chest that will last for years.


The port conversation has been coming up with this stay for me, because they had a hard time placing my PICC in my right arm, they had to balloon my vein to get it in and said my right arm is not accessible after this and my left arm is not available anymore either, so the dreaded port thoughts are here. I had a port when I was younger and the story goes.. I had it placed when I was 16 the year 2000, I was very against it at the time but at that time PICC line placement was not as "easy" as it is now, so it was my only option, so in honor of vanity I had it put in my upper left arm where it was not very visible. After getting use to it and seeing how easy it was for Iv's I loved it and took very good care of it. Fast forward to 2007... I went in for a clean out and my port was not working properly, it wasn't flushing well and it burned in my arm which was not normal. They stopped using it, I did not know what was wrong with it until the doctor came in and started asking all these strange questions, like had I ever had a heart cath, and any heart operations. I was like why are you asking all these weird questions, and then they showed me the x-ray, a 7 inch piece of my port had broke off at my shoulder and went into my heart, lodged in the pulmonary artery to be exact. They did not know how long it had been there since I had not had an x-ray since 2005 (bad keep up that was my fault) they did not know if it would move anymore, or if it had blood clots around it that would move and cause problems, or cause problems when they tried to remove it. It was SCARY I was afraid I would go to sleep and it would move or a blood clot would move and I would not wake up. So that was the next step how would they remove it and at what hospital because Sparrow in Lansing MI where I was had never seen anything like it. So my doctors called and made arraignments to go to University of Michigan in Ann Arbor MI and a heart doctor did a heart catheter with a special made tool with grabbers on it and went in and pulled it out, I was awake the whole time a little loopy with relaxants but still cognitive enough and watched on a monitor which for me was really cool for me because I like to see whats going on when they do stuff to me. But it came out ok and I recovered, and they took the other half out at Sparrow. So now I'm at a point where my next clean out may require a Port again, and I have mixed feelings about it. I know how great it was and I liked the easy access and not having to wait a day or two to get a PICC placed, but then I think about what happened and it scares me to get one again. Ultimately I will do what I have to for the better of my health and my guess is that will be a Port again some day, but I will cross that bridge when I get there.

Hospital Stay and words of Wisdom

So I'm in the hospital, my life with CF has included these hospital stays about once a year for the majority of my life. There would be times when I would go longer then a year and at one point I went over 2 years before I had to go in. They are what the Cf world calls clean outs, we may not be real sick or look sick or even sometimes feel sick, but our Pulmonary Function Tests (PFT's) the test that measure's our lung function may be down from what we call our baseline which is how well we do when healthy or our most resent highest numbers. Most recently for me this is when I get a cold or some other run of the mill sickness and it ends up going into my lungs and I feel like crap. I usually call the office or go in to my regular doctor's and get a prescription for an anti-biotic to try to get rid of it with that and more chest therapy at home sometimes it works, sometimes it don't and that's how I ended up "In the Hole" as we like to call it. Colton ended up with pneumonia and about 2 weeks later I ended up with it. Pneumonia is not usually contagious but with my compromised immune system it managed to spread to me. So all my life I have had these clean outs, and as a kid they really sucked, they suck as an adult too, but it's much worse as a child being jabbed with neddles, Iv after Iv staying in bed all the time and not always understanding why. But as I got older even if I didn't like it I began to understand why and although it still sucked I was better at doing it, that is if you get better at going in the hospital. But the thing is I got better or it got easier because of my parents. They are amazing people and I could not have done it or do it without them. I was raised as if I was "normal" like I was the same as my brother (who does not have CF), not aloud to use CF as an excuse to not do things or go after my dreams, not aloud to feel sorry for myself, that I would live a long life even when they were told I would not see High School, and to be and always do the best I could, because even though I had CF my life was still a blessing. But the lesson that stuck with me the most was that no matter how bad your life is or have it there is always someone who's life is worse or has it worse. That has stuck with me through my whole life the one lesson that I carry with me all the time, so that when and if I feel sorry for myself I can think about that and it makes me think twice and stop feeling sorry for myself. So as I have this stay in the hospital and it sucks and I miss my husband and my son, and he cry's because he misses me and I get sad and wish I was home, I go back to that thought, because somewhere in this hospital and probably more then one place in this hospital, someone is saying goodbye to a loved one or a mother never gets to go home to her baby, or a mother never gets to take her baby home because as bad as I have had it that would be worse and I feel bad for those people when I think about it, and that is why no matter how much it sucks or how bad I have it I am thankful for what I have, even if I have CF, because it could always be worse.

Colton's Journey

Six years ago I was pot bellied, 35 pounds heavier, and ready to be a mommy. Of course I'm talking about being pregnant for Colton. His birthday is on Sunday and my baby will be turning 6 years old :( I give a sad face because the fact is he is not a baby and is growing up to be a boy. His journey was a long one and a fast one all at the same time. As I posted in my blog about my husband and I's story we had a whirl wind love and fast pregnancy. I thought I could not have kids because of my CF and the fact that I had been with someone for years before my husband and never got pregnant with no protection. So right from the beginning he was a miracle to me, little did I know at the time what a miracle he would be. My pregnancy was great as far as CF pregnancy's go, I only needed IV's once which was normal for me anyways. We did not know if my husband was a carrier of the CF gene and we choose to wait to test on him and the baby (we didn't find out what we were having) until he was born, I just felt it didn't matter I didn't need to stress more then I already was. My due date was April 15th, I had gone into labor twice two weeks before I had Colton and thankfully it stopped because it was too early, his lungs were not developed yet. When I went into labor for the last time on March 27th it was safe to deliver he was just over two weeks early, one week from being considered full term. I went into the hospital at about 5:30pm Saturday March 27th, and gave birth to Colton Thomas Purchase on Sunday March 28th at 11:58am. I did very well through the whole birthing process and although exhausted was fine after ward's, but Colton was not. Right after I delivered him they handed him to me and I held him for less than a minute before they took him to the baby bed and started trying to get him to breath better, he was breathing but barely. They took him out and Brad followed them not knowing what was going on. I did not hear or see of Brad until 2 hours later and had no idea what was going on. My first thought was CF, I was scared to death and balled my eye's out, my parents stayed with me until Brad came back. Brad came back and told us they had got him stabilized and on a ventilator but they were unsure of what exactly was wrong with him or if he would come through it. I balled for hours and was finally able to go see him in the NICU about 4 hours after having him. He was on the ventilator, IV's, and many other things in an incubator. After many tests and trying to get gas tubes that tested his oxygen in his belly button, the diagnosis was pneumonia and jondus. He was on the vent for the first 2 days, then they put him on c-pap which is another form of breathing assistance, a feeding tube and IV antibiotics. They had told us at the beginning that he would be there probably a week and then go home on IV's. Thankfully by god's grace he recovered faster then they thought he would and came home 6 days later on April 3rd with no antibiotics and he was eating on his own little by little. Those were the scariest 6 days of my life, and the next 2 months were torture as well. They took cord blood and tested it for CF which took 2 months to get results, I was looking for every single symptom of CF, he never had any. And I got a phone call after his 2 month check up sitting in Wendy's with Brad that the test results were back and after review it showed he was only a carrier from me. Relief is not the word to describe the feeling but it was beyond words how I felt. At this time we still did not know if Brad was a carrier because he still could have been and Colton would have had a 50% chance of getting CF. We waited and didn't have Brad tested until Colton was about 15 months old when we started talking about having another baby. We had Brad tested and sure enough he is a carrier, and that is why we decided not to have anymore children. And that is also why Colton is my miracle in more then one way, he beat the odds not once, not twice, but three times.